BtVS- AOD3: Sister of Mine
by Leni
Summary: Think of Buffy's last line in TWBM. 'Will Kendra think of me as we kill her?"


Ok, ok, I *know* I should be working on 'Complex Cycles' and believe me, I've tried. But I have this HUGE author's block when it comes to this little W/O scene... I promise I'll try to have that fifth chapter finished before next weekend.  
  
This one follows 'The Woman Before Me' and 'Forgive Me'.  
  
TITLE: Sister of Mine  
AUTHOR: Leni  
DISCLAIMER: Well... considering that Angelus hasn't appeared in the show for at least THREE AND A HALF years, (I'm SO not counting that brief apparition in 'Forever' because... Pills?! And here I though that perfect happiness was about being happy and free and guiltiless and NOT about being high...) I'll assume that currently he is owner-less... Thus, I declare myself his owner. *g*   
SUMMARY: Remember that last line of 'TWBM'? Just to refresh your memory... "Will Kendra think of me as we kill her?"  
RATING: I can't believe this is a G. *shakes head* What's happening to me?!  
FEEDBACK: Even if only to say why you didn't like it... BUT especially if you want to say why you did like it... dani_vasq@hotmail.com , a_d_v_v@yahoo.com.ar  
AN: Yes, the poem is mine. Not one of my best but *shrugs* I like it. Hope you will, too. It's called 'Sister Of Mine'.  
DEDICATION: For Sharon. For making me remember that there was a sequel to write and continuing writing the third chapter of 'Mirror Mirror' (insert BIG YAY here and go read the first two!!!!!!) Oh! And for re-making that 'sweet' letter about A:tS and then letting me post it at the Bubble... :o)  
  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
  
// Duty called us every day.  
Cruel Death waiting in the end.  
Was I crazy for wanting to live?  
For loving and letting him love me?  
  
I am sorry for being so weak.  
I am sorry for being in love.  
But love was my only strength  
and without him, I cried in fear.  
  
But you didn't care why I fell...  
so what if I cried bitter tears?  
so what if Death was sweeter than Life?  
Will you just kill your Sister and leave? //  
  
  
She came for us. Hard, dutiful Kendra came to kill the Fallen Slayer. I was not the one to fall at the end.  
  
When I saw her entering the (our) mansion like a fury, I believed that Giles had sent her against me. At the end, she confessed that she had come of her own. Her Watcher warned her of imminent danger on the Hellmouth. As soon as she heard the news, she supposed that I was the Danger. Should I feel honoured?  
  
Bad thing Giles didn't tell her. It would have been his last good deed before he left for England. I guess he didn't like my last visit too much. Even if I didn't harm him in any way. How could I? A Slayer cannot kill her Watcher. A girl cannot kill her father. It doesn't matter if he never approved of my heart's decision. I doubt he approves now, anyway.  
  
He was the one to tell my mother the truth. He told her about sweet Willow, and courageous Xander and innocent me. He told her about our deaths and the threat I now represented for the world. I guess my Watcher was not as wise as I had made him to be. I am not a threat to the world. I am the Slayer, do not forget it. I will defend this pathetic world until my last breath -which already happened twice, but... third time is the charm, isn't it?  
  
It was a good thing he told my mum, though. I just couldn't stand seeing her waiting for her innocent daughter every night. Poor mum, they never found my body and she hoped against hope that I had just fled home. Denial much? Was she waiting for the black sheep to come back and beg for her forgiveness? For weeks I spied on her every night. I saw her through the window, sitting on the sofa and staring at nothing and nursing my favourite cup in her hands. One more week of the same and I would have snapped her neck... You would have been happy, at least.   
  
Yeah, it was a good thing Giles told her.  
  
Nevertheless, I was talking about Kendra. Do you remember her, Angelus? Of course you do. She tried to kill you one, after all. I never did get back to her for that one. Now all debts are paid. Nobody messes with my lover and gets away with it.   
  
Not anymore.  
  
  
// Duty called us every day.  
We were Sisters. We were Friends.  
But you were only strong Duty,  
I could only be sweet Love.  
How could our ways stay the same?  
  
Is it my fault if the world moves on?  
If our ways drifted apart?  
Is it my fault if things are changing?  
And this Fallen Sister is your enemy now? //  
  
  
I didn't plan to kill her. Hurt her, maybe. Make her one of us... it occurred briefly to me. I always will need someone to completely understand me, and try as you can, my love, you were never a Slayer.   
  
But, she was past rational thinking. She kept threatening me. No biggie there. Then she tried to put that awful sword through you. Not gonna happen, I thought. And I killed her. Simple. Easy. Fast. One second and she was on the floor, staring at me with vacant, hate-filled eyes and the sword at her side. It is my sword now. The last reminder of the only girl who knew me better than I did.  
  
  
// I shall remember you, Sister.  
You were Family. You were Me.  
Only innocent staining my hands.  
Innocent blood instead of mine. //  
  
  
Sometimes I wish I had left her alive. Or maybe as one of us. I don't know...   
  
She was special.   
  
But I couldn't let her kill you, could I? What kind of girlfriend would I be? As soon as I saw her ready to deliver that last stroke, I attacked. Kendra thought she had a chance against me. Poor foolish girl, didn't she remember our last fight? Didn't she know that only her pulse and her heartbeat saved her that last time? Didn't she know that attacking you she had sealed her own fate?  
  
  
// Duty called us every day.  
Now another shall hear our Call.  
Now you are dead. May you forgive me.  
You deserved your Destiny more than I deserved you. //  
  
  
I killed her. I killed my sister-in-arms. It just couldn't be otherwise. I am feeling sad. I am feeling guilty. But regretful, I am not. Shouldn't I? You were the one with a soul. Did you feel regret while you possessed it? I am sure you did. Then... does that mean that I don't have one either? Then why do I feel like protecting the world every night? Then why am I so eager to know the new slayer and protect her as well?  
  
Do you think she would let me? A non-souled vampire-Slayer protecting the rightful one. Would it be too scandalous? Maybe she will come for us just as Kendra. And then I'll have to kill the girl I want to protect with my own unlife. That would be ironic.  
  
However, I know that the Slayer will come to this God-forgotten town. Kendra told me that something here threatened the world, and her replacement must be sent her to finish her job. What worries me is that Kendra mentioned prophecies and *you*. She assumed that you turning me was it. But it isn't, is it? I could never destroy my world. I cannot say the same about you.  
  
Will you try to? I am the Slayer. I cannot let the world fall into nothing. Would I be able to thwart your plans, beloved? Of course. Would I be able to kill you to save this pathetic world? Not without condemning myself along with you.  
  
Because I cannot go on without you, lover. And the world can't go on without me, either. Then I guess that the world will have to look for a way to go on maintaining you on it.  
  
Otherwise, the three of us will fall together...  
  
...and it won't be pretty.  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Feedback? Yes, please! dani_vasq@hotmail.com , a_d_v_v@yahoo.com.ar And... uhm... could you PLEASE read 'High Mountains, Wide Rivers' and tell me truthfully if it's worth another chapter? 


End file.
